Saturday, January 23, 2010

what if you were pregnant

In some ways, adoption feels like a completely natural path for our family. For the most part, we have felt very comfortable, excited, and confident throughout the process thus far.

But in other ways, adoption is just about the most unnatural thing that we can imagine. To explain what I mean, consider this scenario:

Imagine you are (or your wife is) pregnant. Then imagine the following circumstances with regard to the pregnancy:

*You have no idea when your baby is due. It could be 4 or 5 months from now, or it could be two years.

*Before the child can be born, you must sit down with your doctor and choose whether your child is a boy or a girl, whether he or she is healthy, and whether he or she will be born as a baby or come straight to you as a toddler or school-age child, along with a host of other characteristics about your child.

*Before your child can be born, you will see pictures and videos of children - one of whom might be your child, but you do not know which one is (or if any of them are) your child.

*While you are pregnant you are told that several other couples are interested in the child you are carrying. If their due date comes up first, they might end up being that child's parents and you will have to wait for another one to come along.

Can you imagine?

I can. This is where we are living right now. It is unnatural and difficult, but it is the good kind of difficulty. It is the labor that produces fruit in good time... and, in that sense, maybe not so different from pregnancy after all.

1 comment:

  1. When you bring YOUR baby (or toddler) home, it will feel natural again. You will know, in time, that it was a divine appointment and that s/he is definitely the one. Not that you don't know that, but you will FEEL it very soon :)